Lesson 2 from 31 days of prayer: What about boundaries when loving like Jesus?

Lesson 2 from 31 days of prayer: What about boundaries when loving like Jesus?

Good afternoon yal (you are loved),

I pray you are all doing well with your resolutions, intentions, goals and/or resets that you may have made this year.  Maybe you’re feeling guilty because you have already ‘failed’ but I’d like for you to shift your perspective just a bit and instead of viewing it as a failure look at it as a lesson to: drum roll please:   maybe not try to be like everyone else! I feel that most of our limitations are placed on us by expectations and comparisons which then lead to jealousy and envy ; it is so exhausting!  I know it is hard, but take what Paul said to the Philippian church. He said to rejoice in all things and pray continually and exhort each other with songs and hymns.  The Philippian church was under so much persecution that most did not have enough for their own daily needs. But their response to Paul was to allow them to sacrifice even more for their ‘more persecuted’ brothers and sisters in Christ.  They were unwilling for any one of their brothers and sisters to perish because of ‘giving up on their faith in Jesus Christ the one true savior or because they haven’t heard the message yet’.  It’s amazing how our brothers and sisters in the faith lived without regard for their safety and their comfort because they knew the message of hope for all time.  They literally sacrificed their lives for individuals they never knew and would never know this side of heaven.  What led them to sacrifice so much?

Have you ever sacrificed so much from your lack, that you did without? Do you feel it should ‘hurt a little’ to give?

How do we have healthy relationship boundaries AND love like Jesus? I’ve been wrestling with this message because if I’m not careful I will convey an incomplete message.  I think the message of boundaries are a requirement to being a follower of Jesus Christ.  You may have to adjust your perspective and perceptions of what a boundary is.  The message that you may have heard is that “no one should encroach on your boundaries so  hold them accountable”.  What if we said instead: “how close can I let them and still be loving, kind, gentle, patient and self controlled?”

Boundaries are God’s idea.  God’s idea to help protect you from others not the other way around.  Boundaries are not to protect you from hurt.  They are to protect others from you hurting them. Galatians 5:22 talks about the fruit of the spirit but Galatians 5:19 tells me the evidence of living in the flesh.  {This is just Paul’s way (the writer of Galatians) of saying good and bad; right and wrong; living like Christ or living like the devil.}  As long as I can be loving, kind, patient, gentle, good, compassionate and self controlled around the person or persons then I am full enough with the Holy Spirit and I’ve spent enough time removing the plank out of my eye before I start taking out the speck of dust in my neighbors eye (Matthew 19:30)  If I’m angry, divisive with  my words, wanting my own way, yelling, belittling, having sexual impure thoughts then I am not ready to be in relationship with that person.  Not because of them, but because of me.  Every one of us has reasons for our behavior and most of us feel that no one else has any excuse for theirs.  I’d like to shift our focus.

What if this year we view behaviors as solutions instead of the problem, and recognize that irrational, hysterical, maladaptive behavior are indicators that a button has been pushed.  One of those deep down rooted buttons that probably needs pulled up and out.  And just consider if God may be using that person to expose it in you.  Especially if that person is a family member.

Just notice if any of these feelings may be at the root of the problem: lack of connection, hope, trust and acceptance.

root/core problem:

connection= oxytocin,


acceptance= serotonin,

trust= endorphins.

Considering that each of these happiness hormones can be hacked; you can read this article that I was quoted in by Alli Lee on ways to do so. https://www.thekokomopost.com/articles/h44bh2bmoiu7y2x53nhrh7nsq2xmjr    

so lesson two from 31 days of prayer: ask yourself “how can I view his/her behavior as a solution”.  “How far away do I have to have this person for me to remain loving and compassionate”.  What does compassionate mean?  a quick google search stated it perfectly : feeling or showing sympathy and sadness for the suffering or bad luck of others, and wanting to help them

Blessings as you continue on this journey with me.  changing minds and hearts is hard work but the Holy Spirit will guide you every step of the way!  Isaiah 30:20 says.  We have the creator of the world living in us/ His spirit is there softening our hearts making it pliable and ready to harvest the seeds of love joy peace patience goodness, gentleness and self control- above these there are no law! Galatians 5:22 but don’t forget to read 18 so you know all the evidence of the flesh:)

see you soon! in person save the date February 24, 2024- at legacy barn.  watch my Facebook – Rita Tattersall or Legacy barn for details and to sign up


you can subscribe to this email list and get them straight to your inbox or pop on here every now and then to see what’s new.  I know I have some Live events that I have completed and will upload- if you can’t wait, you can go directly to my personal facebook account- Rita Tattersall.  we don’t even have to be friends, but my profile is open. Not sure for how long, but for now it is.

for any of your event planning needs and your in the Central Indiana area please don’t forget to consider www.legacybarn.com.  They do a great job hosting and have multiple packages available for your needs.  If you need that event videographer, livestreamed, recorded ect.  please consider www.elevatemediagroup.com.  Both of these companies are near and dear to my heart but I think they are great!



"Thank you for telling me what I needed to hear and not what I wanted to hear; and doing it in the most loving and stern way I've ever seen!"
- Amanda I.

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